B^LXXD BVTH

I feel as if I need a big “venting session” well I mean shits been good I guess, just been tryna chill lately but it ain’t working. I don’t know why but I’ve been moody lately, SOOOO much shit annoys me and idk why :( I miss my girlfriend sooo much but she sleep :/ I guess that means I gotta change my sleeping habits too, but I can’t since I stay up thinking about HER she’s all I think about… She keeps me sane, cause I think i’m going crazy from all the shit that’s been going on. I don’t know how to deal with all my stress and that’s a problem!! I have so much to say but I’m tired, fuck it I’ma finish it… Fuck my phone just vibrated and I thought it was her :( I honestly I think she’s the one I’m gonna fall for. I’m still a lil scared to get hurt, but I mean I’ma G so I ain’t gone trip. It’s just like what if this and what if that, ya know? But like my mom told me “day by day” and I’m trying but I like to “vision” shit in the future but I get stuck and it scares me a lil.. I shouldn’t think so much that’s what’s fucking wrong with me, but that’s just me. I just doubt myself at times :( I feel as if I’m nowhere near good enough for her like I don’t satisfy her. See what happens when I think!!! I get dumb cause it may not be true. I mean idk why I’m so emotional today??? I think It’s cause I’m listening to Lauryn Hill. I don’t feel like this everyday, just today. And some other days, but I mean I think I’m doing a good job.. I wish there was a way to know all this shit. :/ Does this make me insecure? I don’t think so? but that could be me in denial. I’m feeling better tho I just be trippen. I’ma to continue to smoke and remain G as fuck.